JKT

 "What do you think of Jakarta so far?"

I've been here for almost a week now, but I'm still no closer to being able to answer that question than I was when the city first enveloped me in its warm, sweaty hug after disembarking my delayed flight from Tokyo. The only thing I know for certain is that I must tread carefully when I answer.

My friends graciously pick me up despite the late hour and take me back to the three-bedroom apartment we are sharing. We pause at a traffic light near the Fairmont Hotel, and a trio of children selling roses comes and presses their faces up against the vehicle's tinted windows. They are two boys and a girl, dark-skinned, and I cannot resist thinking of Slumdog Millionnaire. I wonder who keeps the money they earn.

Shortly after, we arrive home. A door from the kitchen leads to a small outdoor patio where the washing machine and dryer are located. I notice two other doors opposite the machines and ask what they're for.

"The live-in maid, if we had one." 

She opens them. One leads to a squat toilet. The other - windowless, lacking an AC unit - is a bedroom smaller than the closet in the master suite that is my quarters for the month.  

Our fifteenth floor unit would have a nice view if it weren't for the perpetual haze that clings to the skyline and ensures that daytime is always bright but never sunny. I imagine the layer of grime stuck to the outsides of our windows coating my lungs and wonder if I should be wearing a mask. Noise from below echoes upward, and in another time and place I'd think the building were being swarmed by cicadas. But, no, the source is the neverending, slow-crawling traffic that makes the Bay Area rush hour seem tame; the dull hum of hundreds of engines and throttles punctuated by honking.

Each morning we head down to the lobby around 7am and hail a taxi to take us to the bakery kitchen. Sometimes it can take up to an hour to secure one, but luckily the distance is not so great. My other friend, who lives in north Jakarta, has the worst commute. Depending on the weather and time of day, she could fly to Singapore and back in the time it takes to get between home and work.

We visit one of the coffee shops that our bakery fills wholesale orders for. Inside it's chic, trendy and would not feel out of place in SoMa. Outside, drivers wait with their cars while their employers eat and drink their fill. I think again of the pitiful maid's quarters, and of Downton Abbey; instead of upstairs and downstairs people like they have on the show, here society seems to be divided into inside and outside people.

My middle class upbringing makes me hypersensitive to such blatant socioeconomic disparity, which is perhaps why I find it jarring to be in a place where everyone is either ultra-rich or super-poor. In other words, having grown up without maids, nannies and chauffeurs, it's strange to be in a place where having a full household staff is the norm. As for what it's like outside the home, only in India have I seen such similar juxtaposition of abject poverty with luxury apartment buildings and hotels. The powers that be appear to prioritize feeding the beast of consumerism rather than locking down the infrastructure necessary to get Indonesia off the developing countries list. 

Being a pedestrian in Jakarta is like playing a live-action hybrid of Frogger and Super Mario. Crosswalks are virtually nonexistent and the lanes amorphous, such that you must constantly check in both directions. Sidewalks, also a rarity, are uneven, unlit and often missing paving stones. And in addition to keeping your wits about you, you must hold tight to your belongings - speeding motos have been known to snatch bags just as vans may be used for kidnapping. 

There is no regulated trash collection. Many burn it themselves on the street (a big contributor to the air pollution), or simply leave it for enterprising individuals to root through and re-sell what they can.  (Fun fact: street vendors rely on pre-used oil, generally from KFC).

As a foreigner, as much as I am privy to the class differences, I am also complicit in them. The US dollar is so strong here that I can get manicures, massages and spa treatments - frivolous things that I never do at home for financial reasons - for cheap. I can afford to be driven everywhere and dine out or order in for every meal. It's nice being pampered, to be sure, but it leaves a dull ache in the back of my mind because I know that I'm not experiencing the "real" Indonesia. 

But what is the real Indonesia? Corruption, homophobia, discrimination - CVs must include headshots, height, weight and religion. The people that I've met so far, though, are nice. 

The default social activity here is going to one of the city's many shopping centers. In fact, locals get dressed up for it. Trendy restaurants open in malls like they're rolling out the red carpet down Valencia Street. But when you compare what's outside, the smog, scammers and traffic jams, to the brightly lit, immaculate interiors and cool filtered air, it makes sense. For a few hours, it's nice check your problems at the door and be surrounded by all that is bright and shiny and new in a safe, sterile evironment.

Posted
AuthorMisa Shikuma

I am hereby interrupting normal coverage of our family holiday with a recap of my New Year's Eve. I am also hereby reinstating comments and simple likes, and I encourage you to make use of them as you see fit.

1. Denial

I'm going up the stairs, exiting the Metro en route to a friend's apartment, earbuds in and my phone resting in my coat pocket. I feel someone brush up against me, and simultaneously the music stops. Is someone calling me? 

But as my hand instinctively reaches towards where the phone ought to be, my brain is a step ahead and, sure enough, the pocket is empty. The white cord dangles uselessly as I frantically look about every which way. I want to believe that somehow the iPhone just fell out of its own accord, and I'll find it lying on a step.

The truth is that it's gone, and I've no idea who took it.

2. Anger

Is this a joke? It's the fucking holiday season.

The other passengers have disappeared into the streets, all but one shady-looking guy who lingers near the top of the stairs. Shock has progressed to recklessness so I start to approach him, but as soon as I open my mouth it recedes. What do I say?

"Excusez-moi," I begin.

His lip curls into a sneer; once again my accent has betrayed me. I'm 70% sure he is the thief. But I don't have a dictionary and I'm too emotional to put together the questions that I want to ask. Did you bump into me on the stairs? Did you see anything?

Instead all I can think of is to ask if he has my phone. It's a lost cause. He pulls his phone out and answers it, although I'm fairly certain that it's a ruse and he's actually just talking to himself.

I walk away, seething. Part of me wants to turn around; give the guy a good shove; reach into his pockets and see how he likes it. But the further away I get from the scene the more the anger turns itself inward. I'm furious for being careless. I'm irrationally mad at my friend for asking me to bring things to dinner because the extra baggage slowed my reaction, but above all I'm upset with myself for not being able to communicate.

In six months of living abroad I have never felt more helpless than I do in this moment.

3. Bargaining

Once my friend lets me in I immediately go to her laptop and commence damage control. I log onto iCloud and pray that Apple can Find My iPhone.

As the page loads I make a promise to myself. If the location comes back I will not go apeshit on the person who took it. As tempting as vigilante justice is, I will call the police.

The search comes up empty; the phone is offline. Well, I guess the thief is not a complete imbecile.

4. Depression

Everyone knows that all of life's little events are completely trivial unless they've been simultaneously Tweeted, Tumbled, Facebooked and Instagrammed. So thanks to some random asshole, I have been socially crippled. What is the point of having a good time if you can't post about it? Does it even qualify as a 'good time' if it hasn't been validated by x number of likes, loves, shares and retweets? Does a tree make a sound if no one is there to hear it fall?

(Humblebrag: I had a decent one planned for NYE that had to do with it being Midnight in Paris).

I jest, of course, but the ordeal left me feeling quite upset. The silver lining is that the thief picked a night when it is not only socially accepted, but also expected, to down copious amounts of booze. (I managed to saber the champagne at midnight using a kitchen knife and without spilling a drop, but since it couldn't be documented I guess you'll just have to take my word for it).

6. Acceptance

My phone is gone and part of me went with it. Contacts, schedules, photos, lists, notes - all lost. But it could be worse. I wasn't physically attacked, and I still have my wallet and passport.

So although this was less than an ideal start to 2013, hopefully it means that the year will just get better from here on out.

Posted
AuthorMisa Shikuma
Categoriespersonal

"French women don’t get fat. It’s a phrase forever immortalized thanks to Mireille Guiliano’s popular 2004 'non-diet' book, but as a stereotype I have to admit it’s surprisingly accurate. This is not to say that all Parisians look like size zero fashion models, but rather that in the months since moving here, the only severely overweight people I’ve seen are all tourists. Given that the reputation of the national cuisine is built upon buttery pastries and creamy sauces, the idea of perpetually svelte citizens presents a curious dichotomy. But a closer look at French culture reveals a combination of principles and common sense that optimize both physical health and overall well-being, critical elements that the diet-related disease-ridden and fat-shaming society of America could learn from."

- via Highbrow Magazine

After my editor over at Highbrow Magazine caught wind of the fact that I'm an American in Paris, she asked me to compose an article comparing the two cultures when it comes to food. Now, I previously wrote a semi-serious post about what I miss about America, but food culture is not one of them. What do I mean by this? There are many foods readily available at home that I would kill for right about now (see: peanut butter, bubble tea, yogurt-covered pretzels, extra sharp cheddar cheese, the list goes on), but it's the rituals, stereotypes and double standards surrounding the practice of eating that I can't stand.

Simply put, eating is not viewed as a pleasurable activity by American society. This has a lot to do with the media, I suspect, but there is also the fact that as individuals we tend to place arbitrary restrictions on the foods we eat in oft-misguided attempts to be "healthy." (See: girls who don't eat "carbs").

As a girl I've always found it unfair that, in general, guys can eat as much as they want and no one will comment on or judge them for it. Second and third helpings are totally acceptable for them. Whereas if I, God forbid, finish off a bag of chips, an onlooker would probably say something to the effect of, "Damn, you really went to town on those." (That actually happened once. It wasn't chips but it still bothers me because the obvious implicit meaning was "OMG why are you eating so much, stop it"). 

In that memorable instance it was a guy who said that to me, but girls are equally hard on themselves for what they perceive to be bad tendencies. The conflation of weight and diet is really key here and, yes, the two are related but not as directly as most would like to believe. (Never underestimate the power of genetics, people). I grew up being very sensitive to these issues, having spent almost half my life as a competitive gymnast and then a few odd years as a college cheerleader, and I'm sorry to say that I wasted a good portion of that time being preoccupied with them. But no more.

In the words of Emma Stone, "Life's too short. So eat the damn red velvet cupcake."

Or, in my case, I guess it would be pain chocolat.

Posted
AuthorMisa Shikuma

Yesterday after class, with the help of a couple friends, I made the inevitable move from my apartment in the 15th to my new home for the remainder of my time in Paris in the 5th. For the days leading up to the move I had been battling my dislike of packing with my yearning for the ability to finally settle down and fully nest; trading my awesome roommate for a host family; being able to walk to school in 10 minutes versus...well, I still haven't figured out how I'm going to get there from the new place. In short, there were and still​ are many mixed feelings. 

The new neighborhood seems a lot more lively, and I'm not just saying that because when I moved in there was a police barricade around the corner. ​There's a better Sunday farmer's market, more brasseries and bars, and of course the mosque down the street that serves excellent mint tea. But, as a creature of habit, I don't like my daily routines getting interrupted and having to find new ones. 

This summer when I logged into Facebook I felt a small pang of jealousy ​each time I saw someone post pictures or a status about moving into their new studio/apartment/house. I wish I had that stability of permanence and the independence that comes with having one's own place. Not to mention the fact that many of my school friends live relatively close to each other and get to hang out and do "grown-up" things like go to happy hour together. I think one of the hardest things about living abroad is that, no matter how much fun you're having, there are times when you can't stop thinking about everything you're missing out on at home.

As I write this I'm sitting in an American-style bakery/coffee shop, the type that serves brownies, cupcakes and coffee in to-go cups, and that I used to spend hours at with ​friends while allegedly writing papers and studying for exams. I've missed the people from home since, well, maybe week 2 of class. But it's only now that I'm beginning to miss the other things, even those that I usually took for granted. 

An Australian friend recently asked me if Starbucks is much of a fad at home.​

Being from Seattle, I replied, "It's not a fad. It's a way of life."​

My peers at school sometimes make fun of me for shelling out €4 for a tall soy latte, but I say you can't put a price on nostalgia. And anything that keeps me awake during an 8:30am class is a worthy investment.​

Posted
AuthorMisa Shikuma
Categoriesexpat life